I’m shagged i say to myself,.. i walk out the gates at Flumininco and didn’t realise i was past customs until i found myself staring at a bus, dodgy people offering me everything from hot showers, to roses to “drivings in most comfortable of car”. what sort of business plan does the rose seller have ?? Am I a niche?? “hey I just got off a plane,.. how about a rose to celebrate”!!!The intersting signage at rome leads me to the train station conveniently located near the station via a series of escalators,.. they should just replace them with sheets of aluminium make you sit in a bag and give you a big push so you can go wheeeeee all the way to the ticket office.

Now the bulk of Tourists catch the express specifically designed train to take you direct to Termini station in central Rome…. but no… i like to do things differently,.. im not staying in central rome i am stayin in Trastevere, anybody who knows Rome will be oohing and ahhing about now… but that meant i had to catch the local “regionale”… i accomplished this and was feeling pretty proud of myself… even got off at the right station, remembered that uscita was exit and walked out into romes brilliant sunshine at trastevere station the bags under my eyes feeling heavier than the pack on my back.

I had some excellent instructions on how to get to my hotel however and set off… ok so i didnt have excellent instructions,.. in fact .. i had this map which looked reasonable if you have never been to rome,.. well it turned out to be a useless piece of crap.. and i didnt even notice when it blew out of my back pocket.. the map that is.

I circumnavigated Trastevere station which took approximately 45 minutes walk in full sun… yeah i love rome i was thinking… oooh what a great day… collected my thoughts and figured i need a drink… go to the “bar” at the station and ask for a chinotto…

Asking for a chinotto in melbourne is responded to in one of two ways, “what the?” which means “I am sorry sir but we do not stock the item you requested” … or “yes”. in rome however, chinotto comes in various types and is presented in a number of different receptacles… so i had to go through this pointing exercise but finally got what i thought i wanted.

And then despite my hours of training,.. forgot that you pay at the cashier and not at the counter,.. anyway i think i walked into the only bar in rome where the owner doesnt have at least a rudimentary undrestanding of what theyt have been led to believe is english… i got a drink,.. i think it kept me alive…

I collected my thoughts and headed back out the front of Trastevere station, i started to lose it,.. albeit in a really cool and interesting kind of way. Trams buses, ladies with prams, beggars (polite beggars) all started to whirl into a crazy cacophony with me in the middle and a shower and bed visible on the other side of a chasm… yeah and there were frogs in that chasm as well.. and everyone is scared of frogs… and they were croaking and all.

But the special powers of the chinotto plant kicked in, i saw a group of white cars arranged in some kind of weird circle as if they were taking part in a seance, I staggered towards them,.. an older man walks towards me and says ? “taxi!?” i say “siiiiiiiiiiiiii” I mutter the name of my hotel… he says “ah yes i take you straight there” it wasnt literally around the corner, but it was literally around 3, the fare was 3,80 and in my stupor,..i didnt tip the guy, and even after i didnt tip him he carried my bag to the front desk and said thanks

But that failure to tip will come back and haunt me, taxi karma.. that’s bad karma.

The rest of the day involves me showering and expresing deep feelings of love towards my bed and pillow and the comfort it provided,.. i don’t think internet publishing laws in italy allow me to go any further… i slept for 12 hours from 3pm to am…

Oh i did manage to slip in an hour of late night Italian television… see this is why these people are so sensible,.. freely available soft porn,.. it has to be good for everyone.